Friday.

I just feel great right now. This is what true happiness feels like. <3

I’m not gonna lie I had to throw myself onto the floor to get out of bed this morning. I mean I could have slept in instead of coming to work, but honestly I’m just grateful to have a job that I love that I can depend on.

I feel great, went to the gym last night… Stair Master kicked my ass but it’s all good.

On top of that there was a cold grape Nos in my fridge when I went up stairs and Jesse got me a Yoo-Hoo at the Exxon this morning.

I'm just having one of those days where I’m just happy to be alive and everything is beautiful...I almost feel like my heart could explode from being too full of happiness. I know I'm being gay I’m just in a really good mood and I figured I should blog before my bi-polar self is pissed about something... Ha-ha.

It’s freezing outside but what the hell, the sun is shining, I'm gonna clean my truck out tomorrow... It’s Friday... Today is just the shit.

<3brandi

Im a Bitch.

I wouldnt normally do this but I havent stopped playing this song for about three weeks now because it sums up exectly how Ive been feeling lately. So im posting lyrics.

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I hate the world today.

Your so good to me, I know but I cant change.

Tried to tell you but you look at me like maybe Im an angel underneath

Innocent and sweet.

Yesterday I cried, Must have been relieved to see the softer side.

I can understand how youd be so confused, I dont envy you.

Im a little bit of everything all rolled into one...

Im a bitch.

Im a lover.

Im a child.

Im a mother.

Im a sinner.

Im a saint.

I do not feel ashamed.

Im your help.

Im your dream.

Im nothing in between.

You know you wouldnt want it any other way.

So take me as I am, this may mean youll have to be a stronger man.

Rest assured that when I start to make you nervous and Im going to extremes tomorrow I will change and today wont mean a thing.

Im a bitch.
Im a lover.
Im a child.
Im a mother.
Im a sinner.
Im a saint.
I do not feel ashamed.

Im your help.
Im your dream.
Im nothing in between.
You know you wouldnt want it any other way.

Just when you think youve got me figured out the seasons already changin, I think its cool you do what you do and dont try to save me.

Im a bitch.
Im a lover.
Im a child.
Im a mother.
Im a sinner.
Im a saint.
I do not feel ashamed.

Im your help.
Im your dream.
Im nothing in between.
You know you wouldnt want it any other way.

Im a bitch.

Im a tease.

Im a goddess on my knees.

When you hurt, when you suffer.

Im an angel undercover.

Cant say Im not alive.

You know I wouldnt want it any other way.

Club Chronicles Part 1.

So a few girlfriends and I decided to drag ourselves to IGUANA CANTINA last Saturday night.. We actually ended up having a pretty good time.. drank for free of course. lol.

Anyway the reason for this post was actually to discuss dressing... the clothes and wear and how you wear them. Mainly because there was so many nasty bitches in the club that night that thought their shit was on point.. I just wanted to know why the fuck someone let you walk outta the house that way..

Ladies, when you get dressed, whether you are going to work, school, the club, to get your nails done, or if your just walkin the dog, your clothes and how you wear them represents you and should reflect the person you are.

Let me break it down for you. Dont dress like a slut then expect not to get harrassed at the club. Thats all Im saying.

And if you are in a dress, at the club or at work or at your grandma's house having birthday cake, there is a certain way you have to carry yourself in a dress.. theres a certain way to bend down, and how to sit. Basically keep your damn legs closed.

Clothes are like advertising, Of course you need to think of your audience first.. Who will be around you.. if your tryna meet a decent guy (first of all I wouldnt suggest the club), but if you are going to the club dont dress like a gutterslut and maybe just maybe youll attract a guy whos not a total waste of flesh.

When your dress is riding up over your asschecks, dont be mad if someone pulls up your dress on the dance floor, you pretty much asked for it.

When advertising yourself, less clothing is not always better, for some girls, the reasons behind this are obvious. Even if you have the body to rock it, skimpy clothes leave nothing to the imagination.

Im sure Ill have more to add to this later, but right now Im about to pass the hell out so well end on that note this time.

Oh and PS. the most important thing to remember when you go to the club.. what level of the parking garage that you parked on!!!

brandi

First impressions, not my strong point.

OK.. due to a recent post I just read I feel the need to sorta sum me up a little. haha.

When I first meet people.. and of course Im just going by the impressions i get from people.

They either think I look innocent, or they think Im a total crazy bitch.

For example, my friend Melanie, thought I hated her when we met.. I still havent quite figured that one out yet..Even now, sometimes I say things and she thinks Im being sarcastic when Im really just being straight forward. Example...the other day I complimented her sense of humor, cuz its just as twisted as mine and she called me a bitch. haha. I just stood there like.. hmm ok, she clearly took that the wrong way.

I tried to explain that I meant it as a compliment and she said it just sounded like I was trying to be a douche.

And of course theres the time that I spazzed on Frank.. He quickly retaliated. Once again, he also thought I was just crazy..

Poeple dont always know how to take me.. thats probably an understatement like shit but.. go with it.

I guess what I wanted to say is.. If i meet someone who i think is interesting, or someone i could learn something from im going to talk to them, even if they fight it at first, lol. If you look like drama I will avoid you.

I enjoy good conversation, I enjoy getting to know different people, I try not to be a bitch and keep my craziness to a minimal and Im definetly not as innocent as I look.

Im usually a little shy until I get comfortable enough to spaz. lol.

Im not really sure what impression people have of me once they get to know me better but I usually end up making friends so Ill leave it at that I guess.

Pro-Choice.

Its amazing how one night can change the rest of your life. Well how 20 minutes and something too small to see with human eyes can change your life.

As adults we have to make decisions that effect our lives forever, that effect the lives of the people we love.

These dicisions are incredibly hard to make.. Im not talking turkey or ham for lunch..

These decisions cause huge amounts of stress and after these decisions are made you are different forever.. No matter which path you take, your life has been altered.

You are now a completely changed person than you were a few days ago.

Within a few weeks, youve gained so much, but then its lost again..

You feel empty and alone.

Right now all i can do is pray that the decisions we make today, we can look back on and know the right decision was made, whichever that may be.

iill stand by my friends, through thick and thin, right or wrong, until i cant fight for them anymore.

brandi <3